There are several phrases that my kiddos use that make me giggle. A couple of them lately have been "Whyyyyy????", "What is wrrong with YOU???", "But, but, but, but, but...", "I thought you loved me??". Yes ladies and gents! These are the phrases that my children use that make me giggle. Heck, I even have a smile on my face right now as I type this. You might be thinking "Man! This lady is rotten/evil/down-right-Mean (with a capital M of course)" No y'all. I'm not mean. These are simply giggles and smiles from a mom who is taking back her life and her home. You see, my children have become...oh how should I put this...terrorists. Yes! Little terrorists hell-bent on crushing my spirit and turning me into a rage induced monster. Will I allow this to happen? NO!
I picked up a book the other day. A wonderful, fabulous, saved-my-life kinda book. It's called Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior, & Character in 5 Days By Dr. Kevin Leman. I didn't find myself in any one particular parenting strategy. Dr. Leman suggests that we all have one. Not this mama. Oooohhh no! Instead I am a mixture of all three types. I realize that my situation isn't the same as everyone else's. I am physically disabled, I have four children, and as of this year all four are homeschooled. It was hard for me to chase them down as toddlers to put them into a corner (I love the Supper Nanny techniques...just in case y'all were wondering.) So what has happened in my home because of my disabilities and the fact that I had a hard time chasing them all? Total chaos. At times, complete disrespect.
I will admit that I failed as a mother along the way. I have four babies that God gave to me so I chose to ignore a lot of the things they did. Mostly because at the end of the night, when they were tucked into bed (usually mine) and sleeping they looked so sweet and innocent. Were they so innocent? Weeeell...yes...and a little bit of no. Children know how to manipulate those around them to get exactly what they want. How do I know?...I was a kid at one point! Little monsters! :) My best advice parents is this: Don't give in! It was easier for me to just let them stay up a bit late. Easier to give them a little more leeway when it came to not finishing their chores. I pushed and pushed for them to finish homework when in reality I should have taken the advice I had been given to just let them fail. But I shouldn't have taken the easy way out and since then I have been paying for it. Now, some may be thinking "Why on Earth would you let them fail?" I asked the same thing myself. But turns out that was actually great advice and I should have taken it. Instead I said "But this is my sweet precious angel. If I let them fail then aren't I failing as a parent?" UH NO!
See...this is how it is: The older I get, the wiser I get. I've never been a mom to a 9 year old before. BUT I have been a 9 year old. Here's the problem...my kids aren't me. At 9 I was taking care of a household...mostly by myself. My mother jumped ship years before and my dad was an alcoholic. See...we all have issues. I survived. Probably for the better. I got the lectures my dad would give...but you know what I heard? This " ". <-that my friends is pure gold! Some quality white noise headed your way ;)
So I tried the lectures. Guess what?? Come on...guess. These kids are a lot like me. They listen to just enough to guess at just enough of what I am saying to repeat it back to me to get me to be quiet for 5 minutes so they can go back to doing whatever it was that they were doing that got them into trouble to begin with! Whew! (PS...I'm a long-winded kind of talker at times lol).
Things are starting to shape up around here. For the better finally! Did they do their chores on time tonight. Nope. Did I stay on them...well...not as bad as I usually would. See...it's a learning process for us all I guess. But they did manage to get them done and here I am in my office (ALL BY MY BIG GIRL SELF FOR ONCE...YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!) listening to my children playing quietly before I send them to bed. So to my sweet children: You can ask those questions all you want and instead of being told "because I said so"-like so many parents have been known to say-you will simply be told "because I love you". Some day you might just understand where I am coming from...and then we can both giggle together.
You can get Dr. Leman's book on Amazon and other fine retail stores BUT I'm just gonna post the Amazon link below :) As for me, I will be purchasing Dr. Leman's other books soon. Happy reading and Happy parenting!!
Have a New Kid by Friday
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